Another Half-Staff Flag

Here we go again
The world spins around
The flag goes up and goes back down

I didn't know what it is about a lowered flag in front of a school that brings out such strong emotions in me.  But today it hit me.  It is because that flag always comes with unanswered questions from innocent children. 

Every morning during the week, a fifth-grade student proudly rushes into the building to grab the flag and raise it on a pole in front of the school.  Often, he is so excited to do so that we have to remind him to walk.  This morning, without prompting that I am aware of, he knew where the flag needed to be.  Yesterday,  a school of 3,000 high school students and their teachers were victims and/or witnesses of a school mass shooting.  And a 10 or 11-year-old student knew about it before breakfast this morning.  It is heart-wrenching as a teacher and as mother to know that these YOUNG children cannot and should not (maybe??? I'm torn) be shielded from the events that took place yesterday.  Tragically, this could have and may one day be their story if things do not change.  So we have to prepare these young children to know what to do if "another school shooting" happens to them.  It feels like we are preparing them for a potential bomb in a time of war.  But they have to know what to do, right? 

The questions I was asked today by a group of 4th grade children were questions no one has trained me to answer.  We are rightly taught that if we don't know the answer to a question, we tell the student we don't know.  It shows them that teachers aren't perfect and we do not know everything and that is okay.  We are lifelong learners who seek to find knowledge when it is lacking.  But what about when your student asks you a question like, "why would someone walk into a school and try to kill a bunch of people?"  I can't just ask Siri that one.  I have to tell them I don't know and that there isn't a logical answer.  Not only is their teacher not perfect.  She doesn't know all the answers.  There is no way to take pride that you stumped your teacher this time.  Today they looked to me to have an answer to their deepest questions and I can't find one.  They want so desperately for me to answer them in a way that makes them comfortable, that eases their anxious fearful little minds a little bit.  But there are no words.  All I can do is say that I am so sorry that they have to feel this way.  I have to tell them it can happen anywhere.  I have to tell them we need to be prepared.  I have to tell them that this is why we tell them not to be silly during a lock-down drill.  I have to tell them it is very important to stay absolutely silent and away from the windows and doors.  I have to tell them that I will do everything in my power to keep them safe if something like that ever happens here.  Then I have to tell them that I don't know what else to say.

Every morning during assembly, right after breakfast and right before our students go to their class, we make promises to each other.  The students say:
As a student of ___________ School
I respect myself and others, too.
I'll be on task, on time, never late.
I'll make good choices
ALWAYS SAFE.
I'll be responsible for every chore.
I'm a ____________ tiger,
HEAR ME ROAR!

And the teachers reply:
As a teacher at ___________ School
I will engage every learner, everyday
In higher order thinking
Through innovative lessons
In a SAFE environment.

What happens if our pledges to each-other are not enough?  What happens if our students keep their promise to be safe, and we keep our promise to maintain a safe environment and it still isn't enough???  I pray that day never comes!!!

Inspire Me Monday-IronDAD Chattanooga 9-27-15

Today I am inspired by the Ironman competition that took place in Chattanooga yesterday. I will be competing in my first Ironman competition this May. I will be a part of a relay team in the Half-ironman later this year. I will be doing the running portion of the race. The half ironman consists of a    1.2 mile swim, 56 mile bike ride, and 13.1 mile run. The full ironman is a feat taken on by a small group of individuals, and accomplished by even fewer. It starts with a 2.4 mile swim , followed by a 112 mile bike race, and finishing with a full marathon of 26.2 miles. And it is all completed by one individual at one time. It is the ultimate test of brawn, determination, endurance, athleticism, and heart. And one man, one dad, showed even more heart than anyone else who went on this 140+ mile adventure. He went that whole great distance carrying a person with him...

Chattanooga is a haven for runners.  I knew that the first time I made an official recruiting visit to the University of Tennessee at Chattanooga.  I was being recruited to run track and cross-country as a Chattanooga Running Moc.  It didn't take long to realize that my running shoes would love it here.  Since the start of my freshmen year of college, I put in many miles of running around this city that became a second home to me.  

Alongside my teammates, I ran long runs up and down the hills of Chattanooga, the Baker Street loop over by GPS, hill repeats back behind the golf course, the duck pond loop twisting around the north side of the city, runs out toward East Chattanooga by the car dealerships and the Chattanooga Choo-Choo, runs past the resturaunts downtown, long runs breezing by Finley Staduim and cooling down behind the Tennessee Aquarium, out-and-backs on the Riverwalk, sprints inside McKenzie Arena when the roads were too icy, speed workouts on the blue track at GPS and taking a bathroom and water break in Coolidge Park, the bridges loop if we were just wanting to get a quick morning run in before class on days without pool workouts, runs through the woods at Greenway Park followed by some hill repeats...

And last but not least a good-ole-go-to-run when we were wanting to mix things up...an out and back run to Moccasin Bend.

It was one of those routes we didn't take very often on long runs.  Days that we ran it were the mornings that we sat in our dorm room lacing up our shoes trying to decide where we wanted to run that day.  One of us would say, "I'm getting tired of duck pond and Baker's loop.  I don't feel like driving somewhere to run.  What about running to Moc Bend today?  It's not too hilly."  And off we went.  We would head out of our Johnson Village dorm room and take a left.  We would cross over either Veteran's Bridge, Walnut Street Bridge (aka walking bridge), or the Market Street Bridge, depending on how we were feeling that day.  Once on the north side of the river we would hang a left onto Manufacturer's Road to run past Greenlife and the liquor store, then another left onto Hamm Road.  At some point during the run someone would comment on how bad it smells over by the water treatment plant when it gets hot.  We would tend to pick up to a pretty swift pace as we took off toward Moccasin Bend.  The road was nice and flat and straight as a starting line.  You could see your point of destination.  The spot where you turn around to head home.  That's what was nice about this run.  It's not very often that the end is in sight.  The turnaround point for that run was like the straightaway at the end of a track race.  There aren't many flat spots to run around the city besides the track, but this was one of them.  I honestly remember the feeling I would get on that straightaway leading into the scenic Moccasin Bend property-that feeling that you had more energy left in the tank than you thought you did.  That, "heck, why not speed it up a bit, here?"  It was an opportunity to remind yourself how fast you were, that even in the middle of a long run you still had it in you to let loose a bit and burn some rubber on those shoes.  You start to feel like all of your worries and stresses don't exist anymore.  We would, for a short time, forget about the essays due and looming deadlines and teammate drama.  We would just run.  Fast.  And running fast is a great feeling.

I am sure that is the feeling Cameron Bean felt on his final run last Monday.

Cameron had spent the last year training his father, Steve Bean, to run the Ironman with him. Instead Steve ran it FOR Cameron while Cameron cheered him on from above. 

As Steve was nearing the finish line, the announcer said, "Steve, you are an Ironman!"...he looks more like an IronDAD to me.

(Click above to see his heroic finish.)

They that hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles. They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not be faint. 

Isaiah 40:31